Reflections, Of All Kinds
In these longer essays, written nearly two years apart, I explore my semesters of teaching writing and argument in-depth and offer insights about my values, my experiences (new and old), my (changing) beliefs, and my future. I also reference readings and scholarship from ENGL388V as well as offer commentary on my time as a UTA under both Professor Audrey Farley (2016) and Professor Lyra Hilliard (2018).
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Reflections Essay 2016 | |
File Size: | 64 kb |
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Reflections Essay 2018 | |
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To Observe or Be Observed, That is the Question
The opportunity to observe and be observed in the field of education is invaluable. In 388V, UTAs are given a vibrant and inclusive community to exist within: they’re able to share stories, offer advice, discuss pedagogy and strategy, and teach each other. They’re also scheduled to observe another UTA and be observed in their own classroom. In my own experience, being observed can be stressful. Nerves build up, words you say every day become difficult to form correctly, your armpits sweat more than usual, and you speak so quickly that you’re not even sure you’re comprehending what you’re saying, let alone your students or observer. It happens to the best of us. Nonetheless, you grow so much from this experience--allow me to explain.
This semester, I was not observed by a fellow UTA this semester. I was, however, observed by a few faculty professors from the University of Maryland. I can recall two definite days that faculty observed Lyra and I’s class, but there may have been more days. Regardless, all of these observation days were unannounced and I had no idea it would be happening! I actually think I preferred not knowing. I didn’t have time to get anxious or let my nerves build up. My clothes were less sweaty than they would have been if I knew about an upcoming observation hours, or days, ahead of time. My speaking voice was more level and calm. I probably am an outlier. Some people, I’m sure, are more stressed from surprise visits. But me? I thrived. As did Lyra, but when does she not. Notably, on the days that we were observed, I do recall having more concrete and diverse lesson plans that included lecture portions, small group work, and discussion. I tried to make sure that I was visibly engaged with my students and Lyra, too, for the entirety of the class -- more so than I normally am. I’m not sure if the visiting professors were observing Lyra’s practice specifically in the teaching of writing or the endless joys and possibilities of a well-matched Professor/TA duo, but either way, they seemed to thoroughly enjoy their time with our ENGL101 class. Of course, I can’t attribute this enjoyment to just Lyra and I -- it was our students, every time, who went above and beyond to genuinely demonstrate to these professors how effortlessly it can be to facilitate discussion, transition between activities, and practice new writing techniques.
To read about my time observing another UTA and professor, check out the Class Observation page. A little foreshadowing before you head over there: sometimes, you learn so much about yourself and your own practice by watching someone else do everything that you never think to do. It’s really, truly, totally amazing.
This semester, I was not observed by a fellow UTA this semester. I was, however, observed by a few faculty professors from the University of Maryland. I can recall two definite days that faculty observed Lyra and I’s class, but there may have been more days. Regardless, all of these observation days were unannounced and I had no idea it would be happening! I actually think I preferred not knowing. I didn’t have time to get anxious or let my nerves build up. My clothes were less sweaty than they would have been if I knew about an upcoming observation hours, or days, ahead of time. My speaking voice was more level and calm. I probably am an outlier. Some people, I’m sure, are more stressed from surprise visits. But me? I thrived. As did Lyra, but when does she not. Notably, on the days that we were observed, I do recall having more concrete and diverse lesson plans that included lecture portions, small group work, and discussion. I tried to make sure that I was visibly engaged with my students and Lyra, too, for the entirety of the class -- more so than I normally am. I’m not sure if the visiting professors were observing Lyra’s practice specifically in the teaching of writing or the endless joys and possibilities of a well-matched Professor/TA duo, but either way, they seemed to thoroughly enjoy their time with our ENGL101 class. Of course, I can’t attribute this enjoyment to just Lyra and I -- it was our students, every time, who went above and beyond to genuinely demonstrate to these professors how effortlessly it can be to facilitate discussion, transition between activities, and practice new writing techniques.
To read about my time observing another UTA and professor, check out the Class Observation page. A little foreshadowing before you head over there: sometimes, you learn so much about yourself and your own practice by watching someone else do everything that you never think to do. It’s really, truly, totally amazing.
To Critique or Be Critiqued, Another Question
Just like observations, peer review is a crucial element of growth. I remember my fond, first days in 388V. When it came time for our first lesson plan to be submitted, I felt confident. I was an Education major. Lesson planning felt natural. Teaching writing felt natural. And yet, there was plenty to critique. Looking back, I don’t know why I was surprised to receive as much feedback and suggestions as I did (probably because I was young and thought I was incapable of anything other than perfection, ouch), but now, I am so thankful for the feedback I was lucky to receive. Yes, lucky. Experienced, thoughtful, and competent colleagues were reviewing my work and offering constructive criticism because they cared enough about me, a stranger, and my success in the classroom. Now that’s something special, if I do say so myself.
This time around, I’m the experienced, thoughtful, and competent colleague. I’m giving feedback to younger, fresher versions of myself. I tried my best to maintain a balance between honesty and encouragement. If I really noticed something that wasn’t working or there was a glaring error, I told them. But I wasn’t condescending or belittling because the people who first reviewed my lesson plans weren’t, either, and that makes all the difference. If I saw something amazing or impressive or really well-said or something that I want to steal for my own classroom, I made sure I told them, and then told them again. I don’t mean to quote High School Musical, but we’re all in this together. The more knowledge and feedback I can pass down to the new ‘generation’ of UTAs, the better the program becomes, and the more likely these new TAs are to pass down more information again the following year. It’s all cyclical. I want these new TAs to feel capable, competent, supported, and important. Because they are important, to a lot of students, and many professors. It’s only right that my feedback reflects this. I get excited about education because of my peers and colleagues who are willing to accept criticism and grow from it. Learning to listen to other opinions, digest suggestions, and willingly improve your own practice is what will, in my opinion, reshape our classrooms. I’m hopeful. And it’s all starting here, with a handful of UTAs peer reviewing lesson plans.
This time around, I’m the experienced, thoughtful, and competent colleague. I’m giving feedback to younger, fresher versions of myself. I tried my best to maintain a balance between honesty and encouragement. If I really noticed something that wasn’t working or there was a glaring error, I told them. But I wasn’t condescending or belittling because the people who first reviewed my lesson plans weren’t, either, and that makes all the difference. If I saw something amazing or impressive or really well-said or something that I want to steal for my own classroom, I made sure I told them, and then told them again. I don’t mean to quote High School Musical, but we’re all in this together. The more knowledge and feedback I can pass down to the new ‘generation’ of UTAs, the better the program becomes, and the more likely these new TAs are to pass down more information again the following year. It’s all cyclical. I want these new TAs to feel capable, competent, supported, and important. Because they are important, to a lot of students, and many professors. It’s only right that my feedback reflects this. I get excited about education because of my peers and colleagues who are willing to accept criticism and grow from it. Learning to listen to other opinions, digest suggestions, and willingly improve your own practice is what will, in my opinion, reshape our classrooms. I’m hopeful. And it’s all starting here, with a handful of UTAs peer reviewing lesson plans.